Sobriety can get old

The theme of the Step Meeting was Step #1, and one of the topics was early sobriety, ‘our first meeting.’

An AA brother shared. He had been around the Program for a long time; though he was a long way from his first meeting, it was an outstanding share.

He opened, “I remember going to my first meeting; I don’t remember what was said; because I was utterly self-absorbed, my feelings were the center of my universe; all I remember were my feelings.

“And they made me feel good. My ego was stroked; they said that I was the most important person in the room. For several weeks, they enthusiastically welcomed me back. They even assigned me to a sponsor.

“But, with time, the praise died down. My attendance was an accepted fact. Newcomers got applause and high fives, and I was no longer a newcomer.

“If I had been on my own, I might have stopped coming because the good feelings ran out, and I would have become one of the many relapsers we see at meetings.

“But I had a sponsor. He called me to remind me of the meetings. He was persistent, every week a phone call to remind me of the meeting and another Program conversation at coffee after the meeting.

“One day, driving to work. Someone cut me off. My first thought was, “I hope that he gets to his destination safely.” I was gobsmacked. Though I was alone in the car, I said out loud, “where did that thought come from?”

“I was different. I was reacting in a new way.

“The good feelings became good habits, and the good habits had become good thoughts. I was experiencing character development milestones. With wise sponsorship and a process of osmosis, spiritual awakenings had begun.