The Key is Nothing

Andy Crooks writing as Andy C
2 min readApr 11, 2024

A friend shared at our meeting, “The core of our Program is nothing; it is a pause.”

We were used to his odd starts; he often presented puzzles in the Program.

He continued, “When I was drinking and using, I was reacting. I would see a drink and take it. I did not think about it; I just took it. It was the most natural thing in the world. I did not stop to consider what had happened the other times I lifted the glass and drank. I did not hesitate and respond to the idea and consequences of taking a drink. Like a programmed automaton, I reacted and drank.

“When I sobered up and had a first small spiritual awakening, I followed Bill’s advice on practicing Step Three. The advice that said, “Pause.” I learned to pause before reacting. With a pause, I could respond rather than react. In the gap, I could stop, recall and consider. When confronted with the first drink, a pause permitted me to consider the wreckage of past drinking episodes and remember that it started with the first drink.

“So, a pause is the key to my Program. It is everything. But a pause is a gap; it is nothing. The nothings in my life are saving the everythings in my life.

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Andy Crooks writing as Andy C

For Andy C, not drinking was the first spiritual awakening. He’s been blessed with subsequent spiritual awakenings as the results of the 12 steps.